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With some big changes now in effect for modern Runescape - known as Runescape 3 to anyone who dumped far too much time into what's now Old School Runescape back in the 2000s - the attention of the franchise's 25th anniversary has now turned to the version that still holds a tight grip over the best MMOs on the planet. And there's an entire year's worth of OSRS content already primed to pop in the coming twelve months - including the addition of one very angry cow.

Yes, Jagex just spent a cold Sunday evening in Cambridge, England, waxing lyrical about what's coming to Old School Runescape to celebrate the franchise's 25th anniversary. And while that includes the game's first new raid in four years that I'll probably be far too scared to try, it's the keycaps I'm ready to spend the big GP on.

Old School Runescape's 25th anniversary celebrations are set to bring things like Leagues back in April, with bonus XP drops, fresh Echo bosses, loot and power boosts, and Demonic Pacts to fuel reimagined combat masteries. Deadman: Annihilation - OSRS' temporary battle royale mode - is already back up and running until February 21. Why February 21, you ask? Why, that's when tickets for the Deadman: Allstars finale, this time hosted in Chicago, Illinois, go up for sale. It's one big murder hype machine!

Moving onto actual new content for the average player, the next year of OSRS is looking… dark. Dark, wet, and oddly milky. Though there's no date set, 2026 will feature plenty of expansions to the Sailing skill. spring will see vague boat combat fixes before we soak up the summer sun and waves on a player-designed island. That part comes with additional combat updates and the Red Reef quest. Once fall rolls around, a new Barracuda Trial should drop alongside a sequel to an existing Sailing storyline. Beyond that? A "sea expansion," we're told. See? Wet.

For the lorekeepers, it's the end of the ever-popular Myreque storyline with the 'Blood Moon Rises' quest. And as someone who just raced through Priest in Peril again after maybe 20 years, I can see why it's a fan favorite. Only a grandmaster-tier mission can cap off the series that began mere months after World of Warcraft launched, and we're advised to bring garlic to finally deal with the vampyre threat.

After waiting two decades to put a stake through the Drakan's heart, it's safe to assume this guy is going to be tougher than Count Draynor, so might I suggest bringing a meal better than the 12 cakes I've been chowing down to fight Mind Golems in Camdozaal recently? Seriously, what do I move up to in a Group Ironman? Nobody is doing the cooking. Oh, and that content drop comes with the repeatable Maggot King boss and "new skilling activities" that may or may not be said repeatable Maggot King boss.

Ok, so what else is on the cards for ol' Gielinor? The Fractured Archive - OSRS's first raid in over four years, actually. Jagex is still being a little tight-lipped about this one, but if you quit a while back with a plan to return for the next big showdown, you might want to start grinding some gear. You have until sometime in the winter, yet given that it's already being billed as the "toughest raid yet," don't let your biceps cut off the blood supply to your brain.

Now, if you'll excuse me, my mind is racing back toward those keycaps. Just look at them. If someone doesn't immediately type 'buying gf' on those, they frankly don't deserve them. The keycaps, not the girlfriend. Although…?

Already content with your caps? What about a 3D modelled and hand-painted TzKal-Zuk keycap? As it turns out, all this handy new hardware is part of a larger merch drop coming to the official Jagex shop, which includes a special-edition PC from Starforge Systems that only mentions the average fps it'll manage on games like Black Myth: Wukong and F1: 2024 instead of a game like, oh, I don't know… Old School Runescape? Yes, it does matter, and it's deserving of a whack on the head from the Sandwich Lady.

That whole rig comes with Godsword wall art, a mousepad featuring the iconic login screen (sort of), and an acrylic platelight(?) of the Wise Old Man, who had better cast Ice Barrage on the CPU when I permit it to render Gielinor at 3000+ fps. Gz, Jagex - Runescape is cool again. Here's to 25 more years. Oh, what did I mean by milky? A new seasonal event that involves Brutus the Cow - a fresh F2P boss I suspect we'll see around April Fools. And yes, the usual holidays will have new quests and cosmetic rewards, too. Don't worry.